Waking Up in Veilstone
by Crime Scene Fairy
Summary: Flint, what did you do!" Roark yelled at the wall. "Flint's over there, Roark," Volkner told the glasses-less gym leader. Roark nodded, and turned to a plant. "What did you do, Flint!" Humor, somewhat-crack fic.


**Author's Note:** Hey, guys, here's a fun little piece I wrote after listening to Katy Perry's "Waking Up in Vegas". It's partially based off of it, but it isn't a songfic. Mostly just Volkner, Roark, and Flint being idiots... as usual. Love those guys! I don't own Pokemon, just the computer I'm writing on. Please review! Remember - humor and slight crack.

I hope you guys enjoy it! It was fun to write!

* * *

_Waking Up in Veilstone_

"What did you do!?"

Volkner groaned as he was suddenly jarred from his reluctant sleep. He opened his eyes slowly, only to squeeze them shut as the bright lights of the room he was in blinded him. Confusion set into his mind and psyche as he realized that he had no idea where he was. The electric-type blond gym-leader hissed as a sharp, searing pain snapped through his head.

That voice…

He had easily recognized it, but he had never heard so much anger and fury in it before. The owner of the voice was usually one of the most kind people that most trainers would ever meet, hands down. Seriously, what was going on to make the mild-mannered fossil fanatic going like a Bastiodon on a rampage.

What in the world had happened?

Where in the world was he?

Why did he have a headache of this type?

Why was his usual mild-mannered friend so furious at the moment?

What was going on?

A single answer came to Volkner's mind, and it was an answer that could be the whole reason for all of them. Oh, why hadn't he thought of this before? The answer was often the cause to the many sticky situations that Volkner had found himself in over the past couple of years, so why shouldn't he be involved in this?

Oh, who was he kidding?

It was _so _his fault, some how.

"Flint!" Volkner yelled, sitting up suddenly and his eyes shooting open. "What did you do!?"

Though his vision was cloudy, he was able to see his vibrant red-headed friend shrug innocently. Of course, with Flint's large, bushy red hair, it was easy to find him in a crowd of even millions. Which made it easy for Volkner to pick him across the room. A few moments later, Volkner could see clearly, and he could see that his and Flint's third companion was trembling with anger. Volkner took a good look at him…

And his eyebrow shot up, disappearing above his blond hairline.

Roark, the respectable, kind, and honest gym leader of Oreburgh City, was covered in glitter from head to toe. As in sparkly, hot pink, and extremely bright, glitter. And he looked more furious than normal. And Roark was _never _angry. Not even when Gardenia decided to 'decorate' the Oreburgh Gym for Roark's birthday.

Roark glared at Flint, who looked around nervously, giving a small, 'innocent' grin. "Um, I didn't do it!" Flint exclaimed quickly, clearly trying to figure out how to get out of this situation.

"No way, Flint!" Roark snapped, glaring at him. "You've got explaining to do!"

Volkner glanced around the room, and confirmed that he was in an unknown location. It was clearly a motel room, and Volkner now knew from the horrible pain in his neck that he was sitting on one of those uncomfortable chairs in the room, the ones where if you fell asleep in, you felt like your neck was going to break the next morning. Flint lying backwards on a bed, his bushy hair hanging down off the end of the bed. Roark, meanwhile, was standing near the dresser, his helmet leaning towards the left side of his head, covering his eye. His glasses were missing.

And he was currently talking to the wall.

"Flint, what did you do!?" Roark yelled at the wall again.

"Flint's over there, Roark," Volkner told the glasses-less gym leader. He pointed towards the bed, even though he knew that Roark was as blind as a Zubat without his spectacles.

Roark nodded, and then turned to a plant. "What did you do, Flint?!"

Volkner slapped his forehead, and regretted it immediately. "Ow…" he groaned, falling back into the chair. "Flint, when this headache goes away, I'm going to kill you."

He had probably threatened that to Flint around seven hundred thousand times since he had met him at the age of nine. He had yet to carry out any of those threats against the Fire Elite Four member.

"Get in line, Volkner!" Roark snapped, glaring at his image in a mirror. "Seriously, guys, where are my glasses?!"

Roark, meanwhile, had known Flint for about four weeks, and this was the fifth time he had threatened the crazy Fire Elite. However, Volkner knew that Roark couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a person. The rock-type Gym Leader was - ironically - too soft for his own good.

Flint looked around the room, and shrugged. "What happened, anyway?" he asked, trying to get out of the tangle of sheets he was currently in. After another minute of struggle, he had still failed to release himself.

"I don't know! Where are we!?" Volkner demanded, glaring dangerously at his red-haired friend.

"Don't look at me!" Roark exclaimed. His hat had fallen off, and gave a long 'bang' as it fell down and hit the carpeted ground. Roark jumped to the side, but relaxed after the moment.

"We wouldn't, you can barely see right now!" Volkner snapped. He was honestly more irritated than usual, and Volkner was usually very irritated.

Flint was strangely quiet, and both Volkner and Roark realized that in the same moment. Volkner turned slowly to glare at his friend, and Roark tried, finally looking at the bed to the right of the one that Flint was lying on. Well, at least it was better than the wall, plant, or mirror.

"What. Did. You. Do?" Volkner's voice was strangely quiet and calm. Even though Volkner was usually calm and quiet.

"Where. Are. We?" Roark asked, even more calm than usual. His voice held a deadly air to it… well, as deadly as Roark could get.

"Um… Veilstone. At a motel. Near the Game Corner."

Everything fell into place.

They had been _drunk_.

They were in Veilstone.

This was _Flint's _fault.

"Flint?" Volkner asked, his voice strangely calm.

"Yes?" Flint squeaked, a little frightened at the crazy look on the blonde's face.

"I'm going to kill you."

"I figured that." Flint shrugged indifferently. He had gotten that threat several times before. Volkner had yet to carry it out.

Roark shook his head. "Seriously, where are my glasses!?"

"Don't be a baby, just go without them!" Flint exclaimed, grinning at Roark. "C'mon, Ro, it'll be an adventure!" Strangely enough, his voice had taken on almost a musical tone of voice. Volkner just chocked it up to the alcohol that he had consumed last night.

"One. Don't call me that. Two. The last time I didn't wear my glasses, I fell into Canalave's canals and nearly drowned."

"You can't swim?" Flint asked, cocking his head. He had never known this about the rock-type trainer, but he figured it should have been easy to figure it out.

"Don't change the subject!" Roark snapped at the plant again. A bit of blush appeared on his face.

"Look, Flint, just shut up, alright?" Volkner told his red-haired friend, standing slowly up onto his feet. "I'm calling for help."

"Don't call anyone!" Flint exclaimed, staring at him. "What're you going to say?"

"Come and get us out of here, Flint was an idiot and got us all drunk… does that cover everything, Roark?"

"Sounds good to me," Roark told the plant.

"Exactly. Be thankful I don't call your mother!"

Flint's eyes widened. "Don't!" he begged, trying to get on his knees and failing miserably. "Please, don't call my mother! She'll murder me! She'll _ground _me!" He suddenly scowled darkly. "And if she grounds me, Buck will get all of my stuff! And Mom'll take away everything else, too…"

"At worst, she'll take away your matches," Roark told the wall, shaking his head. "Don't be a baby, remember, Flint?"

"Shut up, Roark." He glanced around. "By the way, your glasses our on the dresser behind you."

Roark turned carefully, clearly not wanting to get even more hurt than he already was. "Thanks for that, at least."

Volkner watched, and then winced when he realized what was going to happen next. "Roark, watch out…"

BANG!

"Ow…" Roark groaned, and held his forehead. "Why didn't one of you warn me about the hanging lamp?"

"I tried," Volkner told him dryly. He shook his head, and then stood up. "I need a drink of water, and then we're going to figure out what we're going to do next…"

He stood up, and then walked over towards the bathroom. Roark shot Flint a dirty look before putting his glasses on. He looked around, and then looked down at his clothes. He leaned down, picked up his helmet, and put it back on his head.

"Why am I covered in glitter?" he asked Flint darkly, glaring at him.

Flint chose not to answer. However, at Roark's next question, Flint realized that he had absolutely no answer to it.

"Flint… why are you wearing Volkner's class ring?"

Flint froze at that question, and then looked down at his ring finger on his left hand. Sure enough, on the finger was a small ring with the initials of Volkner, and Flint realized that his own class ring was gone. A moment later, Volkner came back in with a question of his own.

"Flint, why am I wearing your class ring?"

Volkner and Flint slowly turned to each other in horror, as Roark blinked in interest at the two. The looks of horror on their faces were priceless… but sadly, he didn't have a camera.

He gave a small, private smirk. This was going to be fun. Hell for the two of them…

But after what Flint put them through, he deserved it.

* * *

Riley honestly couldn't believe that he was actually doing this… let alone the fact that the Veilstone Game Corner had let Roark, Flint, and Volkner within two miles of the entrance. Alcohol was not a good thing with any of them. Riley's eighteenth birthday - where Sidney had snuck in alcohol - was a prime example of that.

Riley also had a feeling that the pink-haired gym leader that he was following was going to kill them. Maylene, the pink-haired, mild-mannered gym leader of Veilstone, had called him an hour ago, telling him that 'the idiots had struck again'.

Usually, that meant Flint and Volkner - at some occasions Buck - or even Sidney. However, apparently the idiots this time were Flint, Volkner, and Roark. Flint and Volkner were no surprise, but Riley had known Roark for years, and didn't think that he would do something like this. He had thought that Roark had a brain.

Well, Riley knew that this was going to be interesting, at reach.

However, when they reached the motel room that the three boys were staying in, Maylene and Riley found something that neither had ever expected to see in their lifetimes.

Flint had been tied up and gagged in sheets, and was currently screaming something incoherent through the gag that was in his mouth. Roark was calmly sipping coffee while reading the _Veilstone View_. Volkner was talking on the phone, a small relieved look on his face.

As Riley closed the door behind him, Volkner turned off the phone, and glared at Flint. "You're lucky I got that taken care of," he told him darkly.

"Ah," Roark complained lightly, reading the paper still. "I wanted to beat him up. Would've made me feel better."

Volkner didn't answer as he saw Maylene and Riley. He nodded coolly at them. "Riley. Maylene."

"Um, hi?" Riley asked cautiously, raising an eyebrow at the blond gym leader. "What happened?"

Maylene glanced around, and then sighed before looking between the three men. "Flint?" she asked.

"Flint," confirmed Volkner.

"Flint," replied Roark.

"'ey!" Flint yelled from his gag.

"So, what exactly did happen?" Riley asked.

Roark smirked, and Volkner's scowl turned deadly. "Well," he said lightly. "Apparently, Volkner and Flint were so drunk, they got hitched last night." He smirked. "I apparently was the Maid of Honor, the Best Man, the Flower Girl, and the Ring Bearer all in one!"

Maylene and Riley chose not to say anything. Riley just shook his head. "Um, alright…" Riley said slowly, shaking his head. "How about we all just go home?"

Everyone nodded in agreement, even Flint.

Maylene glanced at Flint. "Why did you guys tie him up, anyway?" she asked, just out of curiosity.

"Oh, we got too tired of him starting to sing that one song that's been going around the radio lately," Roark explained. "He thought that it fit well with the song. It's something like 'Waking Up in… I don't know."

Riley grinned. "Oh, I love that song!" he exclaimed, a grin on his face. "It's really catchy!"

Everyone stared at him, even Flint. Riley looked down at the ground, and then looked at the others before walking over and untying Flint. Flint glared at the two other males in the room, and Maylene shook her head.

"Alright, everybody out!" she ordered. Roark and Volkner followed first, followed by Riley. Flint and Maylene followed behind him, and Flint turned to Maylene.

"Can I please sing?"

"No."

"Please."

"No!"

A moment of silence… a moment, at any length.

"Remember what you told me!" Flint sang, grinning.

Maylene rolled her eyes and hit Flint on the back of his puffy head, extremely hard, as to reach through his puffball that they all called hair. Thankfully, she reached the man's head, and he groaned.

"Fine, I'll stop!" Flint snapped, glaring at her. "Happy?"

Maylene smiled. "Very."

* * *

On the way home in Riley's van, Roark turned to Flint and Volkner. "Just for the record," he warned the two. "Last nigh never happened. Got it?"

"Agreed."

"Duh."

And they all lived happily ever after… and never set foot near Veilstone again.

* * *

**Author's Note: **Hope you guys enjoyed! Please review, I don't own Pokemon, have a good night!


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